Stalking

[Alexis]

Have any of you ladies ever had to deal with a super creepy guy that will just not take "No" for an answer?

A man started asking me out a few days after he started working here at the beginning of the year, he was very persistent and even offered me gifts, which I refused. He left in June and he's called me about 4 times since. He is incredibly creepy. He stutters a lot when he talks to me and he often does not identify himself on the telephone but I know his voice.

I've mentioned it to my boss and put the number up next to my phone so I can screen my calls. Today he called me from a new number.

Every time this happens it makes me feel uneasy and freaked out. My coworkers is suggesting that the next time he calls that I tell him I've reported him for harassment.

I'm worried that something like that would set him off. He knows where I work and what my schedule is. I do not work in a secure building.

Does anyone have any suggestions as to what I can do to get this dude to leave me alone?!?! I feel like I'm not safe at work.

:sadpanda:

[maynard]

Hire a hit man.

Okay, I'm only half-joking.

[Shawn_E]

1. Tell him you're gay.
2. Restraining Order
3. Tell him you are really a man
4. Tell him that you only date black men and that your ex tyrone just got out of prison.

[badkitty3804]

Alexis, is it the same guy that you were having issues with a few months back?

[Alexis]

I've told him three times that I have a boyfriend. Clearly he does not care.

[Alexis]

Alexis, is it the same guy that you were having issues with a few months back?

Yes.

[GiveMeFunkyBeats]

i think i asked in the previous thread when you mentioned this, but...what on earth does he say to you when he calls you?

[elad]

http://www.maniacworld.com/video-archives-march-2007.html

[badkitty3804]

Yes.

Have you contacted the police at all?

If not, GET IT ON FILE ASAP.

[Hitoi]

Whoa, that fucker is still calling?

Do you park in a garage or an open lot?

[bboyneko]

Hire a hit man.

Okay, I'm only half-joking.

harass him back. If u want post his number here or PM it us and ill be happy to call it repeatedly and hang up.

[housecat]

If you seriously feel unsafe you have got to be firm about it. At least your boss knows about it. Have you asked him not to call you at work anymore? I've never been in this situation so I don't know other than just saying you'd rather him not call you anymore as nicely as you can but as firmly as you can.

[Matt Sanborn]

wait are you the one who was getting penis pics sent to your phone?

[Alexis]

i think i asked in the previous thread when you mentioned this, but...what on earth does he say to you when he calls you?

Today when I picked up the phone he said "Hello, how was your weekend?"
I said, "Who is this?" and when he wouldn't answer me I hung up the phone.

The times he called before he pretended to ask about available job listings and I told him that was not my department and that he'd have to contact HR. Then he called again, pretending to ask about jobs and I said "I know who this is, I do not want to go out with you, please stop calling me" he replied with some stuttering nonsense about me being so beautiful and something something

[sassypance]

I would ask for a new location in your office which would come with a new phone number. As long as that's the only way he's able to contact you, I would think that would be a means to an end.

[Alexis]

Whoa, that fucker is still calling?

Do you park in a garage or an open lot?

I used to park in an open lot. We just got a new garage without cameras and I am the last to leave. I am thinking of buying a weapon or something.

[Alexis]

I would ask for a new location in your office which would come with a new phone number. As long as that's the only way he's able to contact you, I would think that would be a means to an end.

A new location isn't possible unless I request being transferred to the NIH campus. I honestly do not want to be scared into moving or inconveniencing myself by having to change my number for this asshole.

I think I will call the moco police tonight and see what can be done about filing a report.

[Matt Sanborn]

I used to park in an open lot. We just got a new garage without cameras and I am the last to leave. I am thinking of buying a weapon or something.


is this in VA?

edit- MOCO....hmmm well VA would have been easier for the weapon.

[ChicoMDK]

I would think about a restraining order because he is definitely crossing the line

or if you want have party invite all of us then invite him and we'll deal with him

[GiveMeFunkyBeats]

I used to park in an open lot. We just got a new garage without cameras and I am the last to leave. I am thinking of buying a weapon or something.


whoa :( why are you the last to leave?

[Alexis]

is this in VA?

No, I work for NIH/CIT near Democracy blvd.

[Matt Sanborn]

A new location isn't possible unless I request being transferred to the NIH campus. I honestly do not want to be scared into moving or inconveniencing myself by having to change my number for this asshole.

I think I will call the moco police tonight and see what can be done about filing a report.


Come work on campus with me!

he would have to go through security check at least

[Funshine]

I used to park in an open lot. We just got a new garage without cameras and I am the last to leave. I am thinking of buying a weapon or something.
Do you carry mace or anything?

[LilLemur416]

I would ask for a new location in your office which would come with a new phone number. As long as that's the only way he's able to contact you, I would think that would be a means to an end.

Exactly. You've already told your boss, but you also need to speak with HR - it's their responsibility to provide you with a safe work environment. I would tell the receptionist/anyone that sits at the front desk that if he ever shows up, they need to inform you immediately and that you do not want to see him (but you should be alerted if he comes to the office incase he claims he's going to see someone else/use the bathroom/whatever and wanders in your direction).

Since he hasn't actually threatened you, I don't know what the legal options are - but if you've told him to stop contacting you, it sounds like it's starting to become harassment. If HR can't help you with what other steps to take, call the local police department and explain your situation & ask what you should do.

Good luck!

[sassypance]

Alexis, go the restraining order route just so it's on record, and I'm sure you know that restraining orders are usually unhelpful if shit really goes down, so if I were you, yeah I would probably look into a taser or something.

[badkitty3804]

A new location isn't possible unless I request being transferred to the NIH campus. I honestly do not want to be scared into moving or inconveniencing myself by having to change my number for this asshole.

I think I will call the moco police tonight and see what can be done about filing a report.

You've told him to not contact you and he's putting you in fear of your safety, it's harassment and you *can* file a police report. More than likely they won't be able to do anything beyond that unless it continues. Just keep filing police reports afterwards and be clear to tell the creep that you are in contact with the authorities and that he needs to back off.

[badkitty3804]

Alexis, go the restraining order route just so it's on record, and I'm sure you know that restraining orders are usually unhelpful if shit really goes down, so if I were you, yeah I would probably look into a taser or something.

In Anne Arundel County, there need to be a few documented incidents for there to be anything done with a restraining order. At least that's how it was a few years ago. I'm not sure how that translates to other counties, but it does really need to be put on file.

[sassypance]

I actually meant to say police report, your advice is correct.

[housecat]

Ok, he sounds kind of crazy. I'd definetly get some pepper spray or something and not ever EVER walk to and from your car alone when it's dark. Especially, if he knows your schedule. I'd def file a formal complaint with the police. Make sure you write down each time he calls and note the date and time. I hope you're already doing this now. Good luck chick.

[LilLemur416]

Just keep filing police reports afterwards and be clear to tell the creep that you are in contact with the authorities and that he needs to back off.

If you're worried that he's going to do something if you tell him you've contacted the authorities, see if there's anyone willing to stay late & walk you to your car for a couple of nights, just to be safe...

[Alexis]

Come work on campus with me!

he would have to go through security check at least

True! but I love working off campus in the land of plentiful parking. :(
Our office on campus is small and understaffed. My workload would increase tenfold. I'm trying to avoid that.

[Matt Sanborn]

True! but I love working off campus in the land of plentiful parking. :(
Our office on campus is small and understaffed. My workload would increase tenfold. I'm trying to avoid that.


www.gracieMD.com

[sassypance]

And Alexis I know you don't want to change anything in your workplace because of this situation, but sometimes you have to and it sucks that things have progressed to the point where your daily life is affected, but I can tell you that the best thing you can do is cut off his ability to communicate with you.

[GiveMeFunkyBeats]

True! but I love working off campus in the land of plentiful parking. :(



isnt there a metro stop or something close to it?

(i know nothing of the metro stops in md)

[Matt Sanborn]

isnt there a metro stop or something close to it?

(i know nothing of the metro stops in md)


:yes:

metro stop on campus

[GiveMeFunkyBeats]

:yes:

metro stop on campus


well, thatd be a whole lot safer b/c ud always be surrounded by the metro riding masses

[PimpZtress RaH]

tell him you are applying for a concealed weapon permit....lol

[Alexis]

Well, I'd have to take the bus from Wheaton to get to the metro.

I'll take my chances. I am not using public transportation from the barrio to bethesda every day.

[Alter-Ego]

I am not using public transportation from the barrio to bethesda every day.

:shady:

Soon I wont be in the Barrio nemore.

[Alexis]

Hey! I'm not knocking the barrio. I live there too! :hahano:

[bboyneko]

your workplace must have some official manner in which to file a sexual harassment claim. I would document the times he calls, or request phone logs be checked as to how many times a day he has called your line, or if he calls your cell phone your cell company can provide you with detailed call log etc.

The primary thing is he has made you feel unsafe. You could always have a friend pose as a police officer to call him at home and say they are investigating claims of him harassing Alexis, etc and that if he does not stop harassing alexis they will have to arrest him etc.

[maynard]

tell him you are applying for a concealed weapon permit....lol

OR... tell him "I'm sorry, but it's against the terms of my probation. Why did I do it? Motherfucker wouldn't leave me alone." *click*

[Alter-Ego]

Hey! I'm not knocking the barrio. I live there too! :hahano:


Who is the boxer in ur avatar?

We are without pooches now.

[Alexis]

your workplace must have some official manner in which to file a sexual harassment claim. .

I'm actually unsure of that process or if it would be useful now since he does not work here any more.

A call has been put in to see what contract he was under and to see if he is still doing work in the government. If he is I will file that kind of claim.

Emily suggested I file a police report and that is what I am going to do.

I'm going to let my boss know about this again tomorrow when she comes back.

:gotme: booooooooooooooo to this

[Alexis]

Who is the boxer in ur avatar?

We are without pooches now.

I don't know. It's just a cute picture. :eee:

[maynard]

I'm actually unsure of that process or if it would be useful now since he does not work here any more.

A call has been put in to see what contract he was under and to see if he is still doing work in the government. If he is I will file that kind of claim.

Emily suggested I file a police report and that is what I am going to do.

I'm going to let my boss know about this again tomorrow when she comes back.

:gotme: booooooooooooooo to this

That sounds like a good procedural order to me.

This sucks, Alexis. :( Makes me super glad I'm a dude.

[kathy v]

your workplace must have some official manner in which to file a sexual harassment claim. I would document the times he calls, or request phone logs be checked as to how many times a day he has called your line, or if he calls your cell phone your cell company can provide you with detailed call log etc.

The primary thing is he has made you feel unsafe. You could always have a friend pose as a police officer to call him at home and say they are investigating claims of him harassing Alexis, etc and that if he does not stop harassing alexis they will have to arrest him etc.

You could legitimately have a police officer "pose" as a police officer and do the same I'm sure. There are legalities about this and I'm sure you have rites to feel safe and not threatened at the work place. If you have to altar your workday in any way because of someone making you uncomfortable, it's harassment.

[bboyneko]

recruit someone to make him disappear. No one knows what happens to those who get disappeared.

[OhNoesIt'sJohn]

recruit someone to make him disappear. No one knows what happens to those who get disappeared.

agreed.

in fact, i will be back in dc on the 6th of dec.

[buzzboy]

Have any of you ladies ever had to deal with a super creepy guy that will just not take "No" for an answer?

A man started asking me out a few days after he started working here at the beginning of the year, he was very persistent and even offered me gifts, which I refused. He left in June and he's called me about 4 times since. He is incredibly creepy. He stutters a lot when he talks to me and he often does not identify himself on the telephone but I know his voice.

I've mentioned it to my boss and put the number up next to my phone so I can screen my calls. Today he called me from a new number.

Every time this happens it makes me feel uneasy and freaked out. My coworkers is suggesting that the next time he calls that I tell him I've reported him for harassment.

I'm worried that something like that would set him off. He knows where I work and what my schedule is. I do not work in a secure building.

Does anyone have any suggestions as to what I can do to get this dude to leave me alone?!?! I feel like I'm not safe at work.

:sadpanda:

Next time he calls "confide" in him about how devestated you are that you are HIV positive and you dont wanna talk to or see anyone for a while.

[Alexis]

This sucks, Alexis. :( Makes me super glad I'm a dude.

Guys get stalked too but not as frequently. For men it's like 1 in 45 and women it's 1 in 12.

[buzzboy]

You could legitimately have a police officer "pose" as a police officer and do the same I'm sure. There are legalities about this and I'm sure you have rites to feel safe and not threatened at the work place. If you have to altar your workday in any way because of someone making you uncomfortable, it's harassment.

Unfortunately due to inadequate laws there is not really anything the police can do unles the stalker becomes physical with you. Has happened with peopel i know in the past who have filed police reports of stalking.

[maynard]

Guys get stalked too but not as frequently. For men it's like 1 in 45 and women it's 1 in 12.

That's 'cause it's not possible to stalk a guy unless you're an ugly chick.

[LizE]

I haven't had an all out "stalker" lately but currently I sometimes get annoyed by some stupid motherfucker calling my phone from a blocked number, then when I answer I get nothing but breathing. 'Sok though, because I'm almost 100% sure I know who it is, and assuming I'm right this person is completely pathetic and a total waste of oxygen. :jerkit:

Anyhoo, back to your situation: Document everything. And definitely call the police. You feel as though your safety is in jeopardy, so I'm sure they'll do SOMETHING. If nothing else I'd bet they'd file a report, just to have a paper trail...

[sassypance]

The shitty thing is... it's MoCo cops. That's a guarantee of them doing nothing and potentially blaming you for getting stalked.

[method]

VARMIT TROUBLE???-
Retired Army Sniper
For Hire. No job too
big or too small. Call
XXX-XXX-XXXX ask for Jim

^ actual classified ad.

[buzzboy]

Guys get stalked too but not as frequently. For men it's like 1 in 45 and women it's 1 in 12.

This is very true i have an Ex that has stalked me in the past. There are plenty of threads and posts by both Laura and myself about my Ex Jenn that just couldnt get over me stalking and harrassing me and my family personally and from multiple online personas on myspace email and letters. She has gone as far as checing herself into my mom's job (at a mental hospital) and intentially testing positive for meth in order to get held at the hospital to contact my mom. Carrying a speculum in her purse. Sendingme tons of emails and my space messages. Createing fake myspace accounts as guys and girls with which she has sent crude and offensive messages to my sister and laura. She has driven 50-100 miles out of her way to follow me through out my daily activities. And has messaged me that she would commit suicide if i didnt continue to talk to her.

She has done so much more and made me worry for laura's safety(becasue she owns guns) but im done talking about her. Just thinking about her ruins my day.

[Alexis]

Carrying a speculum in her purse.

Wtf?

[buzzboy]

That's 'cause it's not possible to stalk a guy unless you're an ugly chick.

or an attractive chick that the guy doesnt wanna fight with any more and has moved on to a much better chick. :D

[bscarry]

Glad to hear you're listening and taking the situation seriously. Sorry to hear that you're still getting trouble from someone that clearly cares more about themself than the fact he's making another person uncomfortable. Don't take your saftey for granted and keep on top of the reports. Get some pepper spray too. he comes near ya...douse his ass...then kick the fuck out of him...and spray em down while you call the police. People that stalk others are only setting themselves up for more trouble. You're smart to be prudent...keep on it :thumbsup:

Hope the situation improves for you too
*poof*

[buzzboy]

Wtf?

many but not all the details are in this thread:

http://www.buzzlife.com/forums/showthread.php?t=97735

[maynard]

or an attractive chick that the guy doesnt wanna fight with any more and has moved on to a much better chick. :D

Yeah, true. Otherwise, though, I'm right for the most part.

A hot girl that wants you sexually...that's not a stalker, that's Christmas come early.

[Alexis]

I mentioned this earlier to one of my coworkers who tends to blow things out of proportion and now there are like 5 people involved in finding out where this guy works now and who he works for.

We even found his old ID so everyone knows what he looks like.

The good thing is I have LOTS of information on this guy, even his Social security number.

[bscarry]

I mentioned this earlier to one of my coworkers who tends to blow things out of proportion and now there are like 5 people involved in finding out where this guy works now and who he works for.

We even found his old ID so everyone knows what he looks like.

The good thing is I have LOTS of information on this guy, even his Social security number.
Good :thumbsup:

The fact this crap has been going on as long as it has, despite you telling Don Juan to leave you alone, is ridiculous in itself. I hope he leaves you alone or gets jammed up by the po po. Folks being treated like this is wrong!!

*poof*

[buzzboy]

I mentioned this earlier to one of my coworkers who tends to blow things out of proportion and now there are like 5 people involved in finding out where this guy works now and who he works for.

We even found his old ID so everyone knows what he looks like.

The good thing is I have LOTS of information on this guy, even his Social security number.

oh then you should use his social security number and personal information to open an account with AOL and solicit children for sex using his name and telephone number =)

it should sort it self out in no time =)

[Precious12]

until they track the IP address

[buzzboy]

until they track the IP address

do it from a hijacked wifi signal. hiding behind a proxy server. =)

[Alexis]

No. I am not going to commit a crime against this person and ruin my chance of being taken seriously if this continues.

[bscarry]

until they track the IP address
:werd:

I tell females i know...if in doubt and you feel threatened jack a fucker in his throat. Pepper spray their ass and make sure they don't get up. ...get away if possible and call the police to let em know where the heap of ailing asshole is writhing in pain. If ya can't get away, keep the beatdown on until help arrives.
My daughter is only 4 now but she'll know how to snap someone's elbow, wrist and shoulder, no problem should she need to, way before she's 18!! The human body isn't meant to withstand focused abuse...men and women can make a dent in just about most people ya run into.


Shame it's gotta come down to that tho if and when this crap happens.
Def a pet peeve of mine. I hate bullies.
*poof*

[kathy v]

Unfortunately due to inadequate laws there is not really anything the police can do unles the stalker becomes physical with you. Has happened with peopel i know in the past who have filed police reports of stalking.

What if a restraining order is in place...

[buzzboy]

What if a restraining order is in place...

I think if she has a restraining order it depends on the stipulations detailed with in that order. Like if he is forbiddin from calling her or if he can only not come with in so many feet of her. And even then a restraining order is not preventative and will not stop him from attacking her. It will only provide recourse if he does so.

[bscarry]

I think if she has a restraining order it depends on the stipulations detailed with in that order. Like if he is forbiddin from calling her or if he can only not come with in so many feet of her. And even then a restraining order is not preventative and will not stop him from attacking her. It will only provide recourse if he does so.
:werd:

why Pepper spray and a violent follow up reaction is the way to DOOO ET :raveon:

Fuck people intimidating you.

Easy way = Please stop, I don't like that
Hard way = Ju a Donkey and Incapacitation is therfore both swift and painfully

Fksssssssssssssssssss!!! I hiss at idiots
*poof*

[Raverjimbob]

This was probably mentioned earlier in the thread, but documenting the times and dates of the calls, and dialing *57 after the call to report the call to the phone company are the first steps in doing anything. When *57 is hit, the phone company keeps a record of the call so it can be used by you, or law enforcement, etc. later on.

After you have a handful of documented times and a few *57's on record with the phone company would be the best time to go to the magistrate and ask for a protective/restraining order.

Then you just need to report the ones that come later and he will be dragged into court for violations of the protective order. After half a dozen or so violations the courts will usually do something. (It doesn't work like on TV where they go to jail for violating the first time, it takes a handful before the court gets pissed off enough to make it's self useful)

I would also talk to your work, you may be able to get his numbers blacklisted by your work's PBX as well and just keep adding them as he gets new ones.

[Skandalus]

I had something along this line happen to me when I was a senior in high school.

I went to a party and met this guy and we exchanged numbers (he seemed okay at the time). Then after he called me and we had a conversation on the phone I immediately decided to not persue any form of interaction with the guy because when not filtered by the loud noise and chaos of a party, he turned out to be really annoying and had a really high pitched voice that I just couldn't stand.

He was a year behind me at school and after I told him very politely that I was not interested, he started putting himself in places at school where I would see him and would pretend not to see me, but keep shooting death glances at me). It was really creepy and all of my friends noticed it.

then it got worse... he started calling my house and hanging up when I answered and would drive by my house like 20 times a day. Then he figured out my schedule at the restaraunt I worked at and would drive around the parking lot for like an hour. Sometimes he wouldn't simply drive, he would race around the parking lot screaching his tires and peeling out. It was kind of scary.

I alerted everyone I worked with and they would all go to the window and watch him doing it, I also told all of my friends about it. I had to be escorted every where to and from work by one of the guys that worked there for a couple weeks. After a couple weeks, one of my guy friends found out where he lived and a few of them went to his house and confronted him... they must have scared him because he stopped after that.


So I dunno, I guess my advice would be to just notify everyone of the situation and if he calls again, ask him to please stop.

If he doesn't, get a restraining order. In addition, try to not go anywhere to and from work without an escort of some kind.

[Skandalus]

also, if walking around by yourself at night, if you don't have pepper spray or anything, carry your keys in between each finger and make a fist. that's what I do anyway.

I have pepper spray on my key chain, but I'm not sure if its legal.... oh well.

[maynard]

Pepper spray is 100% legal, Mace is not.

[Alexis]

also, if walking around by yourself at night, if you don't have pepper spray or anything, carry your keys in between each finger and make a fist. that's what I do anyway.

I have pepper spray on my key chain, but I'm not sure if its legal.... oh well.

I do that with my keys. I also don't wear my hair in a ponytail outside because it's easy to grab. I really don't walk anywhere alone at night and I'm considering asking to change my hours so I can come in earlier in the morning and leave before it gets dark.

[bscarry]

Pepper spray is 100% legal, Mace is not.
Plus from what i've read pepper spray works betta to get people's attention.

are auto batons legal....dat also works to get someone's attention but not sure if they are legal :tarvis:

*poof*

[bboyneko]

are auto batons legal....dat also works to get someone's attention but not sure if they are legal :tarvis:

http://www.aceuniforms.com/osCommerce/catalog/images/ASP52212.jpg

These things are LETHAL in the right hands with the right training, watch what it can do:

<object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TMr9FkjLrxU"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TMr9FkjLrxU" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>

[bscarry]

These things are LETHAL in the right hands with the right training, watch what it can do:

Jesh, you don't see police officers carrying them for no reason!!

Funny video. HA HA HA
*poof*

[Tatts4Life]

I'm actually unsure of that process or if it would be useful now since he does not work here any more.

A call has been put in to see what contract he was under and to see if he is still doing work in the government. If he is I will file that kind of claim.

Emily suggested I file a police report and that is what I am going to do.

I'm going to let my boss know about this again tomorrow when she comes back.

:gotme: booooooooooooooo to this
Hopefully you get this takin care of. My wife had a problem with a guy from her work following her around when she went to lunch at the mall. The guy's married too. She filed something with her work but he would still follow her in the mall. One day when Katie and I were at lunch she saw him following us around. I left her looking at some clothes while I walked around behind the man and yelled as loud as I could "If you do not leave my wife alone I will call the police and have you arrested for stalking." Since that day he has not bothered her at all.

[bscarry]

Hopefully you get this takin care of. My wife had a problem with a guy from her work following her around when she went to lunch at the mall. The guy's married too. She filed something with her work but he would still follow her in the mall. One day when Katie and I were at lunch she saw him following us around. I left her looking at some clothes while I walked around behind the man and yelled as loud as I could "If you do not leave my wife alone I will call the police and have you arrested for stalking." Since that day he has not bothered her at all.
Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice!!

Good one!! :thumbsup:

*poof*

[Precious12]

definitely adjusting the schedule would be a good idea...you don't want him getting accustomed to your schedule and trying to plot some shit (i think i said that in the old thread too but i think that's pretty important to say again)

[LOGO]

also, if walking around by yourself at night, if you don't have pepper spray or anything, carry your keys in between each finger and make a fist. that's what I do anyway.
Fuckin' right.
Wolverine stylee.

Sorry this is happening to you, Alexis. :sadblue:

[Tatts4Life]

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice!!

Good one!! :thumbsup:

*poof*
Hey he got the message, I forgot I even threatned to tell his wife.

[jukata]

If he worked at your job you've got his SS#, address, and DOB on file, right?

Remind him of that, and that with that info, your boyfriend and his very helpful and protective friends can find him anywhere.

Also, give it to the police and tell him you did.

I'm very sorry to hear about this, keep me in the loop.

[ransom]

I can't remember which building you're in Alexis, but you should request a security guard to escort you to your car at night.

I know my building (Rockledge 1) has 1~2 guards at the desk at 8PM when I leave, and I would imagine your building is the same, since it's also NIH and practically across the street.

[Skandalus]

Hey he got the message, I forgot I even threatned to tell his wife.

that is sort of like my situation where, when confronted by other guys the guy backed off.

I wonder if this is a "thing" with stalker types... that when it's out in the open and everyone knows what's going on or they are confronted by another guy it scares them off? or maybe it's just a coincidence of sorts. :shrug: I would be interested to hear a profilers view on this.

[jukata]

Those with broken fingers and jaws find it difficult to make harassing phone calls 100% of the time.

I'm certainly not encouraging anything like that though. Just quoting some popular statistics I read somewhere respectable.... or maybe just pulled out of my ass.

Give the law a try first, it'll at least help to have it on record that you were having a serious problem, should something actually happen. I like the suggestion of having someone escort you to your car, too.

Mace doesn't do much in a can that sprays a stream, get one of the hairspray mist type mace cans.... or a taser if they are legal here.

[Matt Sanborn]

dude, me and my friend maced eachother one time- let me tell you- IT SUCKS.

A LOT

[sassypance]

In Ceramics class in high school, like right after 9/11, my friend Valerie left her keychain on the table with her mace on it, and some punk came up and decided to spray it. I grabbed the keys and threw them in my bag knowing she was going to be in deep shit after the entire class and the next class over started coughing non-stop. They had to bring in fans and air the place out for the rest of the day while a full search happened in the cafeteria. It was like two weeks before graduation and they were threatening that the person wouldn't walk in the ceremony, but she ended up turning herself in.

Seriously, he sprayed not even a full spray and 40 or so people had burning eyes and throats.

[Matt Sanborn]

Seriously, he sprayed not even a full spray and 40 or so people had burning eyes and throats.


imagine a full shot to the face! (beavis laugh)

seriously tho it sucked, WAY more so than the stun gun.

[sassypance]

I can't imagine. Ugh.

[stormryder]

Yeah...'cause a stun gun only lasts a couple damn seconds. Mace takes for-fucking-ever to wear off.

Try CS Riot gas sometime. Without a gas mask.

[Alexis]

Here is an update...

Someone from his company called him and asked him if he was contacting anyone at his old place of employment and of course he denied it, then he asked "Well, what is the number they are saying I'm calling from"

Why the hell would that matter?

I was encouraged to change my voicemail to something without my voice "Because he could be calling and you know, getting off to your voice or something"

EWWWWW!

[GiveMeFunkyBeats]

I was encouraged to change my voicemail to something without my voice "Because he could be calling and you know, getting off to your voice or something"

EWWWWW!


ewe :sadblue:

[feelfree]

u must have a seeeexxxy voice! :catalyst: i j/k i j/k :wink:

[Maffew]

Options:

1. Get a large boyfriend. This is the most typical female defense. A large stupid boyfriend that takes orders.
2. Definitely get some pepper spray.
3. Don't answer when he calls and avoid him at all costs. Paying any attention will only prolong things.
4. Gouge eyes and kick balls if needed.

If he's not identifying himself on the phone he's pretty far gone. I would be a little cautious at this point.
I wouldn't worry about work. I would worry about the to and from work.


I think everybody has stalking type feelings at one point or another. It's just a matter of realizing that life is not a fairy tale and being able to deal with rejection.

[Maboroshi]

anyone know where to get pepper spray now adays? i would like to get my hands on some for my commutes to and from work.

[5l1mm]

anyone know where to get pepper spray now adays? i would like to get my hands on some for my commutes to and from work.
well first we have standard
http://galls.com/style.html?assort=general_catalog&style=SD085
then discreet
http://galls.com/style.html?assort=general_catalog&style=SD087
then party sized
http://galls.com/style.html?assort=general_catalog&style=SD089
i ordered my duty gear from here back when i was into malicious behavior.
they have high quality products and good service.
plus you get a catalog with every order.

[stormryder]

The interwebz. NY & CT are the only states they can't ship to.

[EmmaK]

Here is an update...

Someone from his company called him and asked him if he was contacting anyone at his old place of employment and of course he denied it, then he asked "Well, what is the number they are saying I'm calling from"

Why the hell would that matter?

I was encouraged to change my voicemail to something without my voice "Because he could be calling and you know, getting off to your voice or something"

EWWWWW!
:(

Have there been any more incidents?

[housecat]

The interwebz. NY & CT are the only states they can't ship to.
I never actually ordered it but google pepper spray. There was some link up top that had keychain sprays for like $20. I'm assuming you just want one to keep in your purse for your walks to and fro. That's what I was shooting for and would get myself.

[Maboroshi]

thanks for the info

[Alexis]

No, there haven't been any more incidents.

I think he was scared when his old boss told him I would take legal action against him and they would have my back.

I cannot remember if I mentioned this earlier (too lazy to scroll back) but this guy is Married. Which was really shocking to me.

One of his coworkers, who must have been fond of him had this response:
"Are you sure it was him? It couldn't be him! He's Married and Indian men don't do that"

So, just to let everyone know. Indian men are incapable of extramarital affairs!

She also tried to accuse me of leading him on. :wink:

[PotBelly]

She also tried to accuse me of leading him on. :wink:
You should stop making the sexy voice on your voicemail. What else would a guy think when you don't take his calls? He knows that answering message was made especially for him.