A bit harsh perhaps?

[BlackDragonTjr]

Let's say that a friend of your's was dating a girl , and said girl was introduced to your circle of friends. Said circle of friends was extremely large. Girl started hanging out with your clique @ parties and oddly enough, she had very few friends of her own.

Let's say girl did something *Extremely* shiesty, and broke up with guy friend. Let's say said Shiestyness was the most disgusting thing anyone in a relationship could ever concieve of doing.

Then girl continued to go out and wondered why ex-boyfriend's friend's refused to talk to her... to the point where she pretty much disappeared altogether.

Question being... is the mass excommunication of a single person for a grossly socially unacceptable act justified or a bit too harsh?

[Tigger]

It depends. WTF did she do?

[cleophite]

depends on the situation. i don't think its always wise to stop talking to someone just because they had a falling out with a friend of yours, but if they did something really heinous, then maybe its for the better. if what they did shows a really ugly side to them, why would you want those qualities in a friend? just make sure you get the story from all angles before you judge, and then go with that. :shrug:

[Ragin Bajin]

No pics..... No care...

[Jungleluv09]

Justified

[Light Touch]

I'm a fan of excommunication. Especially when she talks shit about you to your friends.

Get yo own friends...beeyotch.

[housecat]

I'm kind of harsh and if someone does something shady or disgusting I want nothing to do with them. :shrug: I'm pretty nice until someone f's with me or a friend. There are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story so make no assumptions.

[Mandaba]

you can look at it a few ways. one way is that the person didnt do anything to YOU so why should you stop talking to them. or you can look at it as, that person did something to YOU friend, and by fucking with YOUR friend you dismiss that person.

[housecat]

Originally posted by cleophite
depends on the situation. i don't think its always wise to stop talking to someone just because they had a falling out with a friend of yours, but if they did something really heinous, then maybe its for the better. if what they did shows a really ugly side to them, why would you want those qualities in a friend? just make sure you get the story from all angles before you judge, and then go with that. :shrug:
What she said.

[Jungleluv09]

I think it's justified... See with guys it's different, when a girl does something abhorrent, I'm through with her. My boys can try to hit that... I'm done. :raveon:

[bboyneko]

we should bring back public beheadings or death by hungry tiger in a large arena, that would rock!

[badkitty3804]

VERY RECENTLY there have been some major break ups within my direct groups of friends. I don't think it's fair to cut someone out of your life because they ended a relationship with another person you cared about. If they're your friend, they're your friend.

I mean, come on, when Dan and I broke up back in November, I think I would have been absolutely heart broken (on top of the heart ache already going on) if ANY of my "friends" cut me out because I broke up with him. :shrug: Life happens, things change, people change. If you don't move along with it, and adapt to the changing relationships...you're going to have massive regrets.

[Jungleluv09]

Look if you were my friend, and you did something of utter contempt :wave:

[Jungleluv09]

You are the weakest link. Good bye!

[badkitty3804]

Like someone said before...depends on the situation.

To err is human.

Sometimes good people screw up in relationships.

[A.J.]

LINCH LINCH LINCH

*goes to grab pitch fork* :D










:jk:(sort of) If all your large group of friends stopped hanging with her mabey theres a number of reasons for it. :shrug:

[Jungleluv09]

I "regret" nothing.

[housecat]

I have not one single regret in my life and I would change not a thing. That's saying a lot. I think it depends on the situation (doesn't it always) and that good people DO fuck up. We are all just people nobody is perfect. I think nobody should cut ties with someone based on heresay ONLY on things they see or know for a fact. Everone reacts differntly in a situation. :shrug:

Big fat word to what Emily said.

[punkasschikadee]

Originally posted by Light Touch
I'm a fan of excommunication. Especially when she talks shit about you to your friends.

Get yo own friends...beeyotch.

:werd:.

[Jungleluv09]

Really I'm just saying that because all of my relationships have ended in disaster... I regret nothing because the decisions I've made only resulted in greater strength for myself. People fuck up, yes, but no longer on my time...

[punkasschikadee]

you dont want that kinda person around you, affecting you and your friends
not unless you can help her :shrug:

[Jungleluv09]

I've given up on trying to change people, as there is no use. People will do what people will do...

[badkitty3804]

I just don't see how the way someone reacts in a relationship with another person should affect the relationship that you have with them. :shrug:

[punkasschikadee]

never give up on faith bruv

[housecat]

Originally posted by badkitty3804
I just don't see how the way someone reacts in a relationship with another person should affect the relationship that you have with them. :shrug:
I don't think it should. You should base any opinions on your OWN experience. That's my opinion anyway.

[Jungleluv09]

Ahhhh, but faith is where my foundations are it is ALWAYS with me

[Ragin Bajin]

Originally posted by Ragin Bajin
No pics..... No care...

[KlondikeTW v2.0]

Originally posted by Ragin Bajin
No pics..... No care...

[Mandaba]

:stupid:

[housecat]

Originally posted by Ragin Bajin
No pics..... No care...

[Chicago]

Anything that takes place within the confines of a relationship doesn't belong anywhere else. I have known some really good people who have had some seriously fucked up relationships and I have never stopped talking to anyone over their romantic lives in sofar as I'm not in it. Your friends should learn to do the same.

[BlackDragonTjr]

Well here's the thing...

The two people in question : My friend Attican and his ex girlfriend.

The situation : A large amount of VCR tapes with dates ranging from 1998-2004 which show her having un protected sex with various men. And other sexual acts.
She's been living with him and had been his 'girlfriend' since 1997.
He found the tapes under the bed they shared and got curious and watched them. He kicked her out immediately.

She went around telling us (his buds) that it was his fault, she did nothing wrong and that she's upset he violated her privacy. And that he was "asshole" for doing so and didn't think we should stand for it. (sounds odd doesn't it?)

Last time she tried talking to me about it, she pretty much tried to justify her escapades in really bizarre ways. Most of which tried to lay the blame on my friend. (How does one drive someone else to cheat and record the acts and PLACE THEM UNDER THE BED THEY SHARE?)

I really haven't talked to her since, but I've been having a guilt trip about not talking to her. She's really NOT someone I want to be around, but she used to be just a good a bud to me as Attican.

[Mandaba]

COCK SLAP DA HO!

[badkitty3804]

:werd:

That's shady as all hell.

You did answer your question though..if she's not someone that you really would hang out with without her BF...:shrug: She's obviouisly not really a friend...just an accessory that your friend toted around for a really long time.

[housecat]

She's a whore and a stupid one at that. Screw her.


No, not literally :)

[Mandaba]

a Claire's accessory at that, cheap and breaks easily.

[Chicago]

Then get yourself out of their relationship, if she was as good a friend as you say she shouldnt even feel the need to justify herself or what she's done. I wouldn't sleep with the girl but I wouldnt stop being her friend either, we all make decisions in our lives and we aren't always proud of them, but in the end we don't truelly let anyone down but ourselves.

[Wickity]

Kick her in the putty-tat...





Hard...

[lupitanahsee]

IMO it wasn't YOU she did this to. if your relationship with your boy is that strong that you're not able to forgive what she did to him, then drop her. if you view it as part of their relationship that you shouldn't get in the middle of, then keep her...also depends on the kind of company you want to keep.

[SiK BuG]

http://a5.cpimg.com/image/49/44/25746505-1a77-016800F0-.jpg

[Mandaba]

:haha: YES! BRAD I LOVE YOU! :specialed:

[Jungleluv09]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Well here's the thing...

The two people in question : My friend Attican and his ex girlfriend.

The situation : A large amount of VCR tapes with dates ranging from 1998-2004 which show her having un protected sex with various men. And other sexual acts.
She's been living with him and had been his 'girlfriend' since 1997.
He found the tapes under the bed they shared and got curious and watched them. He kicked her out immediately.

She went around telling us (his buds) that it was his fault, she did nothing wrong and that she's upset he violated her privacy. And that he was "asshole" for doing so and didn't think we should stand for it. (sounds odd doesn't it?)

Last time she tried talking to me about it, she pretty much tried to justify her escapades in really bizarre ways. Most of which tried to lay the blame on my friend. (How does one drive someone else to cheat and record the acts and PLACE THEM UNDER THE BED THEY SHARE?)

I really haven't talked to her since, but I've been having a guilt trip about not talking to her. She's really NOT someone I want to be around, but she used to be just a good a bud to me as Attican.


I thought abhorrent was the right word for it. Now it seems an understatement, on my part! :sick: is more like it!

[iminxtc]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Let's say that a friend of your's was dating a girl , and said girl was introduced to your circle of friends. Said circle of friends was extremely large. Girl started hanging out with your clique @ parties and oddly enough, she had very few friends of her own.

Let's say girl did something *Extremely* shiesty, and broke up with guy friend. Let's say said Shiestyness was the most disgusting thing anyone in a relationship could ever concieve of doing.

Then girl continued to go out and wondered why ex-boyfriend's friend's refused to talk to her... to the point where she pretty much disappeared altogether.

Question being... is the mass excommunication of a single person for a grossly socially unacceptable act justified or a bit too harsh?

 

that would completely suck aSS.

[Chicago]

Now read this thread then go back and read the plur thread.... amazing what part didnt you guys understand? the peace? the love? the unity? maybe the respect? ahh so its only to those you deem worthy of it, you have just failed in the same place all the organized religions of the world have

[Jungleluv09]

Originally posted by Chicago
Now read this thread then go back and read the plur thread.... amazing what part didnt you guys understand? the peace? the love? the unity? maybe the respect? ahh so its only to those you deem worthy of it, you have just failed in the same place all the organized religions of the world have


What? Have I been a victim of another experiment? I will not be judged by you or any other person on this board.

Thank You

[Jungleluv09]

oh yeah :redfu:

[iminxtc]

it was a strange story...... so yeah umm plur and stuff

[Chicago]

life is the experiment my friend, i just pointed out the ironny in it

[cleophite]

Originally posted by Ragin Bajin
No pics..... No care... less talk, more fix :shady:

[Jungleluv09]

okay, if you choose to view your life in this manner. Fine, but for a minute there you seemed a bit patronizing...

[Jungleluv09]

besides, five people voted NO to PLUR! :sadblue:

[Chicago]

i was referring to everyone jumping into the flame war, not just you personally, i have gotten pm's from moderators for saying less to those much more deserving,

and as for this dudes friend, if he was in a relationship with this girl and was so completely clueless to the fact that she was sleeping quite literally around from the description you gave, and video taping it, and storing said video tapes in their room and through it all he was completely oblivious, than I would have to concur with her that he obviously took little to no interest in her or their life together and probably deserved to be cheated on

[punkasschikadee]

i voted yes :wave:

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

I voted yes too :affection:

[Jungleluv09]

Yay! :stupid:

[punkasschikadee]

plurrific.

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

Originally posted by Jungleluv09
Yay! :stupid:
*types and deletes*

[Jungleluv09]

PLUR?

[Jungleluv09]

:crying2: Why, why me?

[Chicago]

awww plur for the angst ridden junglist, lol

[punkasschikadee]

I grrr @ u!!

[Jungleluv09]

:whoa: et tu Brute'?

[Chicago]

i actually say that too, its cute but kinda faggy

[Jungleluv09]

Hey look! everyone check out my pet bunny:

http://www.buzzlife.com/mssg_brd/showthread.php?s=&postid=697210#post697210

[Chicago]

i saw, im still scrubbing the image of sarah eating anyone's hershey bunny out of my head

[Jungleluv09]

:haha: not my bunny, rite?

[punkasschikadee]

:afterbuzz: its okay its okay im on a diet :evilblue:

(not really)

[Jungleluv09]

you said it, not me... :ontome:

[punkasschikadee]

what

[Jungleluv09]

I'm :jk: :delirious:

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

Yes... yes.....

check out that bunny....

[punkasschikadee]

not funny

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

:crying2:

I thought so. It made me laugh.

[punkasschikadee]

not you :slap:

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

Oh.. okeedoke :smooch:

[punkasschikadee]

Originally posted by punkasschikadee
:afterbuzz: its okay its okay im on a diet :evilblue:

(not really)

Originally posted by Jungleluv09
you said it, not me... :ontome:

a bit harsh?
meanie

[GimmeABreakBeat]

Originally posted by Light Touch
I'm a fan of excommunication. Especially when she talks shit about you to your friends.

Get yo own friends...beeyotch.




agreed

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

Originally posted by punkasschikadee
a bit harsh?
meanie

Yah, that's why I squashed his bunny... he's being a meanie-head tonight!

[punkasschikadee]

:hifive:

u got my back :D

[DeAtHmOnGeR bEaR]

Hells yeah!

:woot:

[Light Touch]

Originally posted by punkasschikadee
you dont want that kinda person around you, affecting you and your friends
not unless you can help her :shrug:

...and you can't help her.

[Charran]

If someone did that to one of my friends then I totally agree/understand shutting that person out from their clique. It is some really fucked up thing to do to someone. He really need to go and get tested for STD's now.

If it had been just a regular break-up then there would have been no reason to stop talking to her.

[Jungleluv09]

Originally posted by Funshine
Yes... yes.....

check out that bunny....


Meanie Monster! :crying: You killed him!

[Jungleluv09]

Originally posted by punkasschikadee




a bit harsh?
meanie


That's the name of the thread!

[Julierose]

Originally posted by Charran
He really need to go and get tested for STD's now.


:yes:

and let me just say... I wouldnt talk to her anymore either... I had a friend in a similar situation but he didnt have the good sense to send his bitch packing... No one talks to either of them anymore... Its sad really... :sadblue:

[Moebius]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Let's say that a friend of your's was dating a girl , and said girl was introduced to your circle of friends. Said circle of friends was extremely large. Girl started hanging out with your clique @ parties and oddly enough, she had very few friends of her own.

Let's say girl did something *Extremely* shiesty, and broke up with guy friend. Let's say said Shiestyness was the most disgusting thing anyone in a relationship could ever concieve of doing.

Then girl continued to go out and wondered why ex-boyfriend's friend's refused to talk to her... to the point where she pretty much disappeared altogether.

Question being... is the mass excommunication of a single person for a grossly socially unacceptable act justified or a bit too harsh?


Happens all the time.

:fett:

[velvetgoldmire]

Originally posted by Chicago
i was referring to everyone jumping into the flame war, not just you personally, i have gotten pm's from moderators for saying less to those much more deserving,

and as for this dudes friend, if he was in a relationship with this girl and was so completely clueless to the fact that she was sleeping quite literally around from the description you gave, and video taping it, and storing said video tapes in their room and through it all he was completely oblivious, than I would have to concur with her that he obviously took little to no interest in her or their life together and probably deserved to be cheated on
No, you're wrong. Nobody deserves to be cheated on. If he wasn't listening, then they should have communicated better, or gotten therapy. Or should have broken it off. Break ups happen all the time and they can be hurtful and heart-breaking, but cheating is a soul-sucking action. It sounds like she wanted to be caught, and may have been starved for attention from him, but, man, what a way to get negetive attention from someone. Seeing that kind of thing can be detrimental as hell, making you unable to trust someone ever again.

If you feel the inclination to cheat, have some balls and break up with the person first before you go around video taping yourself fucking other people for all but one year they were together.

[lupitanahsee]

:werd: sage like, rob :wink:

[velvetgoldmire]

:bowasian: Thank you, Kim.

Love is wonderful. Trust is sacred. Breaking of trust can lead to ruin. Why do that to someone you're suppossed to care about? Cheating is the most selfish act someone can commit. If you find ways to justify it, then you lose the inherently good parts of yourself you were born with. Worse, you rob someone else of their trust and possibly ability to find love ever again.

[lupitanahsee]

:meditate: :bow:

seriously though, very true.

[housecat]

Rob is wise.

:affection:

[velvetgoldmire]

:smooch: Dank ye.

[Kuro]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Question being... is the mass excommunication of a single person for a grossly socially unacceptable act justified or a bit too harsh?

Back to the original question, no it's not.

[Kuro]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Well here's the thing...

The two people in question : My friend Attican and his ex girlfriend.

I suppose it might be the case that your friend never goes to the same clubs and parties as anyone around here and no one who reads this will ever meet him, but do you really want to use his name considering the content of this story?

[lupitanahsee]

Originally posted by housecat
Rob is wise.

:affection:

:yes:

[Julierose]

Originally posted by Kuro


I suppose it might be the case that your friend never goes to the same clubs and parties as anyone around here and no one who reads this will ever meet him, but do you really want to use his name considering the content of this story?

:werd: its not like Attican is a common name (if that's actually his name)

[housecat]

Originally posted by velvetgoldmire
:smooch: Dank ye.
It's true you give the BEST advice. Good listener like :whoa: too :)

:hifive:

[velvetgoldmire]

Originally posted by housecat

It's true you give the BEST advice. Good listener like :whoa: too :)

:hifive:
I have many attributes... all good. :D But, as my filthy assistant, you know this. :wink:

[housecat]

BWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA!!!

:yourock:!!!!

[lowdogg]

what everyone else said: depends upon the situation

[Nos]

Thats fucked up right there, dude.

[housecat]

:stupid:

[Mokey]

bitch go to bed
:smooch:

[Chicago]

Again, we are all sitting here as spectators getting one side of a story from a third person. That being said there is alot of judgement going on. None of us know the first thing about either person, the relationship they shared, or any events leading up to or surrounding the course of the relationship including what I'll bet is one fucked up self esteem and probably sexual abuse in her past. I'm not saying anything including cheating on another person is ok, but in my case, if a girl cheats on me, she is really cheating on herself because I know what I have to offer and don't put all my self worth on the shoulders of another person. But I will stand behind my statement that if she had the time and inclination to sleep with that many people for that long, and video tape it, and store the videos in plain sight in their bedroom, and he had no idea something was up then I would have to say that he couldn't have possibly even known the woman he was living with.

[era one]

lets say , lets say , lets say , lets say , lets say

[housecat]

Originally posted by Mokey
bitch go to bed
:smooch:
Screw you hobag.

:smooch:

[velvetgoldmire]

Originally posted by Chicago
Again, we are all sitting here as spectators getting one side of a story from a third person. That being said there is alot of judgement going on. None of us know the first thing about either person, the relationship they shared, or any events leading up to or surrounding the course of the relationship including what I'll bet is one fucked up self esteem and probably sexual abuse in her past. I'm not saying anything including cheating on another person is ok, but in my case, if a girl cheats on me, she is really cheating on herself because I know what I have to offer and don't put all my self worth on the shoulders of another person. But I will stand behind my statement that if she had the time and inclination to sleep with that many people for that long, and video tape it, and store the videos in plain sight in their bedroom, and he had no idea something was up then I would have to say that he couldn't have possibly even known the woman he was living with.
Obviously not, but you said that this justified her cheating. Maybe he didn't pay enough attention to her... OR maybe she kept it well hidden from him. When people put their trust in other people, they give them the benefit of the doubt that they won't do fucked up shit like that. Sometimes, even when they see it right in front of their face, they won't see it. Denial can be a powerful thing, especially when emotions are involved. I'm pretty sure that, like most of life's situations, both people and neither one at the same time are to blame. It's a two-way street. But, I still call her actions fucked up. Maybe he did something fucked up too, like hit her or something, but we don't know about that. All I know is, somebody's gonna burn in hell for this one.

[housecat]

:bow:

[MaryAnarchy]

depends on what the offense was, or if i bonded with this girl.
if i knew her as ________'s girlfriend, and had a shallow relationsihp with her, i wouldn't talk to her.

if i got to know her and forged some bonds with her, i would still talk to her

then again, like i said, it depends on what it was.

[MaryAnarchy]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Well here's the thing...

The situation : A large amount of VCR tapes with dates ranging from 1998-2004 which show her having un protected sex with various men. And other sexual acts.
She's been living with him and had been his 'girlfriend' since 1997.
He found the tapes under the bed they shared and got curious and watched them. He kicked her out immediately.


dude, that's foul.

that's an image you will NEVER get out of your mind

what a dumb slut.

it'd be wise for him to get screened for diseases...you never know.

[sirenofthestorm]

Ultimately it is your own choice weather or not to ex-communicate someone. I am all about forgiveness and reconciliation but the act this chick did seems as if she had no regard for her bf. I don't know her motives and cannot pass judgement. Is it harsh, yes but at times people need a slap of reality.

[velvetgoldmire]

Also, the fact that she was trying to turn his friends against him so they would favor her is selfish as hell.

[ggfab]

Originally posted by BlackDragonTjr
Well here's the thing...

The two people in question : My friend Attican and his ex girlfriend.

The situation : A large amount of VCR tapes with dates ranging from 1998-2004 which show her having un protected sex with various men. And other sexual acts.
She's been living with him and had been his 'girlfriend' since 1997.
He found the tapes under the bed they shared and got curious and watched them. He kicked her out immediately.

She went around telling us (his buds) that it was his fault, she did nothing wrong and that she's upset he violated her privacy. And that he was "asshole" for doing so and didn't think we should stand for it. (sounds odd doesn't it?)

Last time she tried talking to me about it, she pretty much tried to justify her escapades in really bizarre ways. Most of which tried to lay the blame on my friend. (How does one drive someone else to cheat and record the acts and PLACE THEM UNDER THE BED THEY SHARE?)

I really haven't talked to her since, but I've been having a guilt trip about not talking to her. She's really NOT someone I want to be around, but she used to be just a good a bud to me as Attican.

OMG!!! OH MY GOD!!!

That is disgraceful and probably the worst thing I've heard in a long time. When you said BAD...you meant it.
I cannot believe people cheat to begin with...how shallow and loathesome!!! My GOD, have enough self esteem to get out of the relationship and get ALLLL the diseases you want. I don't think I could have contained my inner-mafia-driven insanity...I probably woulda burried that bitch and I am not playin around.
OMG- with all the diseases and unprotected...holy shit.
And THEN the skank even videotaped her disgusting infadelity and tried to blame it on everyone else.
THIS, I'll say again is priceless. I hope I never run into this person knowingly.

done ranting. GOD THAT IS BAD!!

[DeliriumDneRite]

Originally posted by Chicago
Anything that takes place within the confines of a relationship doesn't belong anywhere else. I have known some really good people who have had some seriously fucked up relationships and I have never stopped talking to anyone over their romantic lives in sofar as I'm not in it. Your friends should learn to do the same.

You can't really say that. Some things are just really unforgivable. And depending on how good of a relationship that you have with the person getting screwed over, I would say its toally justifiable. Like Kim. I love my Kim...bestest friend ever. Any boy did any damage to her, physical or emotional. I think I could seriously cause some damage to them...But then again thats just me...I'm very loyal and very protective.

[leona69]

a person has to be ab le to take responsibility for their actions...if you can't take it, don't dish it out....

[MaryAnarchy]

yeah, too bad no one pays attention to good advise like that

i wonder how many people would be left if all the dumb ass reckless stupid people got killed off?

[DeliriumDneRite]

It's really upsetting when you start to think that its the fault of dumb ass wreckless people that cause the demise of soemone else who might be responsible and taking care of themselves. I do a lot of volunteer work in HIV prevention, and one of the biggest arguments we have is whether or not there is such a thing as "100% safe sex". I say no. And the reason I say no is because of posts like this. A person who believes themselves to be in a mutually monogomous relationship, who is trusting the other person is being monogomous as well, is infected with a disease that will eventually kill them, because of someone else's irresponsible, and selfish decision. How do you know who you can trust anymore. You think that becuase a person is nice, and good to you, and they tell you they love you, that they are a good person. I'm coming to the conclusion that nice, is way different than good. It's just depressing to me to know that we've come to a time where trusting the person you love can cause you to get sick and die, in ways that you never dreamed imaginable. Have you guys ever seen some of the opportunistic infections that come from immune suppresion. It's frightening.

Toxoplasmosis- rots your brain till you can't function and it stops your heart from beating.

KS- Cancer that eats holes from the outside in.

CMV- Makes you go blind.

All because some girl or guy couldn't keep their lustings in check. Sorry, touchy subject. Didn't mean to vent and get gross.

[retail]

:chilly:

[iminxtc]

:wtf:

[MaryAnarchy]

basically he's railing on stupid fucks who cheat on their sig others and have random sex and take the chance of knowingly spreading diseases that can kill you.

[n-root]

she farted in public didn´t she... god thts disgusting, you should kill her

[lupitanahsee]

:haha:

[MaryAnarchy]

?