Wedding related: officiant?

[Hitoi]

Might as well add to the pile.

Ideally, I'd like to have a Catholic wedding but Mike isn't Catholic and when we factor in all the paperwork, red tape, pre-cana, etc...it just isn't happening.

But I don't want some random person giving a generic speech/sermon to marry us if we end up having a non-demoninational ceremony. How do you find the right officiant? I'm guessing there isn't some like online database of available priests in the area (or is there?)

[Funshine]

I hear Charly gives a good rate.

[Hitoi]

I was waiting for someone to mention Father Charles :afterbuzz:

[maynard]

Minister Black?

I'll do it for $20 and some of your fine home-brewed ales.

[Matt Sanborn]

we are having Minister Brandon Black do ours :yes:

we dont do the god thing...so he should work just fine.

[badkitty3804]

Vegas: Elvis weddings are proven to last.

[zartan]

This probably isn't for you if you need Catholic elements in your ceremony but we aree using an officiant from the Washington Ethical Society, a secular humanist congregation on upper 16th street that is completely nonreligious. They are great but they won't talk about God in their part. They are cool with you having religious readings however.

[shade]

if you really want full customizability.. go with cam =)

he's the same as charly, ULC approved, and has done 2 ceremonies now.

there actually is an online database i had found before though http://www.weddingpastorsusa.org/

eric/zartan also had some non denominational nonchurch community organization thing who had some people that could officiate.

a lot of venues will ask that you use their officiant, and you might be surprised by how accomodating some pastors can be. methodists, for example, are not picky at all and will pretty much tailor the ceremony to whatever you like. we have chosen a methodist pastor because he is a part of the church we are using, but my brother and his wife had a female methodist pastor come and do their ceremony at wolf trap too.

[Hitoi]

Thanks for the feedback, peeps.

I'll have to check that database when I get home, it's blocked as a "personals" site here at work, lol.

[Kellym]

i am having a tough time w/ this one. does anyone else have any names?
any advice would be greatly appreciated :)

[Muramasa]

:godblocked:

:ripped:

I really would like to be there though. :)

[Dj Ikarus F.]

Having a catholic wedding when one person isn't catholic isn't a huge deal if you (or your family) know(s) a priest and neither of you has been previously married. they'll need your birth and baptismal certificates (specifically the catholic one, but preferably both) and you'll have to do the pre-cana stuff, but it's really isn't that much of a hassle, and if your catholic family is anything like mine, they'll appreciate your effort. I'm getting married in december by a lutheran minister with a catholic priest co-officiating (at a lutheran church). as long as the priest is willing, he'll most likely do what he can to make it as smooth as possible.

[malleus]

how bout having a family member officiated (im not exactly sure how this works) and then they can marry yous guys. this way the words could be a lot more meaningful. do either of yous have a cool uncle or something?:shrug:

[Kellym]

we are non religious. I have been emailing so many ppl and they are already booked. I guess i should have done this a month ago...

[LilLemur416]

how bout having a family member officiated (im not exactly sure how this works) and then they can marry yous guys. this way the words could be a lot more meaningful. do either of yous have a cool uncle or something?:shrug:

You can have a friend or family member become ordained online with somewhere like the Universal life church (http://www.themonastery.org/?destination=ordination - I just googled "Online Ordain" and there were a ton of results), and then have them perform it :shrug:

[angela52882]

I used a non denominational officiant named Brenda Sommerville. She was awesome. I think the website is www.takeavowministries.com

[NightWatch]

I just used the one my sister had used. He did a good job but he was like an hour late.

[Jungle Jessi]

You can have a friend or family member become ordained online with somewhere like the Universal life church (http://www.themonastery.org/?destination=ordination - I just googled "Online Ordain" and there were a ton of results), and then have them perform it :shrug:

this is what cam did so that he could marry his sister. (and then us later.)

i think thats the best option.....it keeps the focus on having the ceremony be centered around people that you love and it's much more personal. :)

[DJ Psymon]

Might as well add to the pile.

Ideally, I'd like to have a Catholic wedding but Mike isn't Catholic and when we factor in all the paperwork, red tape, pre-cana, etc...it just isn't happening.

But I don't want some random person giving a generic speech/sermon to marry us if we end up having a non-demoninational ceremony. How do you find the right officiant? I'm guessing there isn't some like online database of available priests in the area (or is there?)


I just got married last May and this is how it worked for us... I got married in Maryland, so I don't know if this varies (and it probably does) state to state or even county to county... but here's the low down. My brother, who is studying to be a minister but is not ordained actually performed the ceremony. He did all of the do yous, and such, and as a matter of fact none of that even matters... All you need to do is go to (in my case) Montgomery county court house, and get the marriage license form. This just needs to be filled out, signed on the day of your wedding and signed by whomever it is that you decide to recognize as clergy (this can be anyone as long as both of you say and sign a form at the court house stating that you recognize him/her as clergy). Then all you need to do is have them sign it on the day of your wedding and there you go. I know it sounds too easy, but that's how it worked for my wife and I.

[Raverjimbob]

We had the clerk of the court marry us - we wanted a simple, quick, cheap wedding.

It was simple quick and cheap, but we got what we paid for. She announced us as Mr. and Mrs. (wifes last name) - My father in law still gives me shit about that telling me how cool it was I took his daughters name.

I guess you can't expect too much from a wedding where 5-6 guests showed up rolling....

[LilLemur416]

I just got married last May and this is how it worked for us... I got married in Maryland, so I don't know if this varies (and it probably does) state to state or even county to county... but here's the low down. My brother, who is studying to be a minister but is not ordained actually performed the ceremony. He did all of the do yous, and such, and as a matter of fact none of that even matters... All you need to do is go to (in my case) Montgomery county court house, and get the marriage license form. This just needs to be filled out, signed on the day of your wedding and signed by whomever it is that you decide to recognize as clergy (this can be anyone as long as both of you say and sign a form at the court house stating that you recognize him/her as clergy). Then all you need to do is have them sign it on the day of your wedding and there you go. I know it sounds too easy, but that's how it worked for my wife and I.
Doesn't work that way in the district. They have to be a member of an organization recognized as a church in the district who will "vouch" for them that they are able to perform marriages to get a license, or they have to jump through a bunch of hoops to petition to be able to perform a marriage (they must provide a statement from the religious organization saying they are allowed to perform marriages and the by-laws of the organization).

It's not a *hard* process, but it is slightly annoying. The minister performing our ceremony had to go through it (he is a minister in the Moravian church and was based out of MD, but since there are Moravian Churchs in DC, and the minister at one was his apprentice, it was easy for him to go the first route which is a lot more simple & quick).

[Alexis]

She announced us as Mr. and Mrs. (wifes last name) - My father in law still gives me shit about that telling me how cool it was I took his daughters name.



Did you take her last name because yours was difficult to pronounce or spell? My bf has a difficult last name that everyone mispronounces/fucks up but mine is common and easy to spell. My full name would be hilarious if his last name became mine.

[Raverjimbob]

Did you take her last name because yours was difficult to pronounce or spell? My bf has a difficult last name that everyone mispronounces/fucks up but mine is common and easy to spell. My full name would be hilarious if his last name became mine.

I didn't take her last name - the clerk fucked up.

[Kristalight]

Honestly...does it really matter? Unless you video tape the ceremony, I can promise you that you won't really hear or remember what the pastor/priest/whomever says. You think it matters so much, but there is so much that goes on during the wedding day that a lot of it gets lost in either the hurry or the emotions.

And yes...I have been married. I honestly didn't remember half the stuff that happened that day. It's kinda sad for as much as you spend on the wedding. It's not your day as much as it is for your guests.

[Kellym]

we finally found this lady we both liked. We interviewed one other lady and I must have emailed and spoke to a couple others. I think this was one of the most stressful things I had to handle so far w/ the wedding.
Anyhow, she's a 'celebrant" so we get to write our ceremony. We both are really non-religious so we were really happy to find someone who didn't try to push her beliefs on us. Several others we talked to seemed to be fine with the non-religious ceremony but kept bringing up church in conversation. We were afraid that someone like that might get really preachy if they had the chance.

[jukata]

Actually he's done 3 ceremonies now. Highly recommended, but I don't know if he's "in the business" or just does it for friends/family? I'm happy to ask him for you if you want. If your position is explained, I think he would be interested in helping. He's an all around great guy!

if you really want full customizability.. go with cam =)

he's the same as charly, ULC approved, and has done 2 ceremonies now.

[jukata]

I believe Liam is not far from becoming a Ship's Caption.

That's a legal option!!